My Grandmother...

Something happened the day before I set out for Mina.  I received news that my grandmother had died.  Earlier that day I was in the Haram, looking at the Kaabah making duah for her and all my other loved ones.  I was asking Allah SWT to make her a Muslim, not knowing that she was already gone. My grandmother was 85 years old and yet I thought that she would never die.  I knew in my head that one day I would get that call, but not in my heart.  

The last time I spoke to her was a couple of months ago.  I talked to her about moving to Egypt.  She couldn't understand why I would want to come here. When I told her Cairo, it was as if I had said Israel.  I guess they are pretty close, but not really.  Anyway, by the end of the conversation she agreed to come visit next year.  I'm sure she would have come if she could have.  

I find myself thinking about her alot lately.  I think about her life.  She lost her mother when she was quite young and she married early.  She was not happy in her marriage but she did find comfort in her children.  My grandmother had 6 kids.  My Mom was the oldest.  I guess alot of women find comfort in their children.  

She moved to the US more than 30 years ago.  She spent her time working and with her kids.  She traveled alot.  This summer alone she went to Ecuador and the Dominican Republic.  

My grandmother was a strong woman who will be missed by many.  I only wish she would have accepted Islam before she left us.

My Hajj experience...

My Hajj experience was incredible, beautiful, amazing and extraordinary.  It was all these things and more, much, much, more.  It was an emotional journey.  It was also very physical.  I would recommend that everyone get to Saudi as soon as possible, you won't regret it. 

I'm sorry but I can't tell you what happened.  I won't.  It was too precious, too wonderful to write.  You really need to see for yourself.  

Arafat

It is said that Arafat is hajj. After experiencing Arafat I can understand the meaning of this. All of hajj was an experience that was unexplainable, but I will try to explain some of my interpretation of what happened.

On the 10th of Dhul Hijira you go to a place called Arafat. This place was where Adam and Eve were reunited after 200 years, this was the place the prophet gave the his last khutba, where Adam was forgiven, it is also called the Mountains of Mercy. All of these incredible things happened here, there is another incredible thing that happened there, it was me.
On the day of Arafat you are supposed to be there by Dhur and leave after sunset. There is no special prayer or duah or any other rituals. Dhur and Asr are shortened and combined and there is nothing else to do except make duah.

When I stood up with my hands raised facing the kabba to make duah there the first time, you understand this is truly a special day, there are no words to describe the feelings, it is like an emotion that I have not experienced before, its almost like some of the other emotions are a part of this Afarat feeling. Some of the things that I felt are euphoria, happiness, joy, understanding, calm, contentment, being satisfied, being fullfilled, a feeling of having all of your needs being fufilled. These are some of the things that I felt while making duah, each time the feelings intensified and finally at the end of the day at sunset all of these feelings became almost overwhelming. At the time when the sun was setting, everyone was standing with their hands raised facing the Qiblah, there was no sound to be heard except for the silent sobbing, there were millions of people there and they all seemed to be doing the same thing. The appearance of the sky was something that I have not seen before, it was as if this sky was for those of us on Arafat seeking Allah's mercy. The scene was surreal, this in combination with the feeling made this experience unlike any other. By the time the sun set it was like all of the previous experiences came to a pinnical and it was overwhelming. At this moment is something I have no words for, and cannot explain. Allah is Great.

After this moment, after this experience things are not the same. It takes a couple of day to recover from this. I feel that my life is better, in a way that I do not know how to explain. I Love Allah.

Our Journey to Makkah

To get our visas was an adventure in itself. We received our visas on Thursday, that same day we went to get our tickets, the only tickets available were for the next day. Our intentions were to leave the following week, so we were not quite ready, but we ran around and got ready with the help of our children. Allhumdillah we got on the plane before it left.

At the airport there were alot of people wearing ihram, which made me feel more comfortable wearing it. When we arrived at the airport in Jeddah it took about 7 hours before we got on the bus to come to the hotel. It did not seem bad to me, I kept on reminding myself that this is part on my journey and making constant dhikr. On the plane for part of the way, the whole plane was reciting Labaik aLa humma... It was beautiful.

Visting the kaba with all of those other believers is something that cannot be described. You are at the kaba making tawaf, going from Mount Safa to Mount Marwa, you are in awe at the number of muslims doing the samething. We are all Muslims and our numbers are Great, Subhanallah.

Just looking at the Kaba is something you can not do enough, you stop looking because you have to go eat, sleep or use the bathroom, but you just want to be there. This spot was seen by Adam, Abraham, Ishmail and our beloved Propthet(pbuh) and more. I cannot describe the feeling. It is not a burden to make hajj but a blessing. It is a gift that Allah have given to all of us here and all of those that came here before to be able to see the kaba.

I am making dua for Everyone. May Allah grant us all Jannah and protect us from the fire, the torments of the grave, the trials of this life and the next and protect us from the dajjal.

Allah is Merciful.

Makkah

I am writing this from the Holy City of Makkah. This is the most beautiful and incredible place I have ever seen. I love it here. I love being near the Kaba. We have been here 6 days and it has been a very emotional and exciting stay. There are so many different looking people here. Truly all the people of the world are represented here. We will begin the Hajj on Saturday Inshallah.

I miss all my kids. I pray Allah SWT keeps them safe and well.

And so they're off...

Mom and Dad left for Hajj last Friday. They landed there safe and sound, met up with their group and have already performed their umrah. They say everyday thousands and thousands of more people come. They sent some pictures. I posted some of them on our Flickr Photostream, along with other photos of Egypt, but this one is my favorite.

Tomorrow is Anissa's birthday. She's going to be 9. Happy Birthday. :)